[Team Blog] Angry Birds

[Nikolai II]

Detailing the Stockbowl team Angry Birds and their experiences in the world of Blood Bowl.

This Dark Elf team almost started out as a 1 RR, 2 Runner, 4 Blitzer, 1 Witch, but persistent comments from bbtactics forumgoers changed it at the last second to a 2 RR, 4 Blitzer, 1 Runner standard build.
This can still be seen in some of the fluff comments of the players, where the last two linewomen were by fluff admission added because two other players were removed. (Had to go home.)

So far the team has only played in one "Reserves Rumble" - a single-match game against another equally rookie reserve team. (Toastwood Treehuggers, rookie Chaos)

As first games went it was fairly acceptable. I won 3-0, lost casualty game with 1-2 and managed 2-0 in completions.
Both sides suffered a serious injury. I got -AV on a linewoman that I can't afford to replace anyway, and besides she got the MVP so I guess I'm stuck with her for a while. He got -ST on a Goat, who's been duly retired already.

Anyway, off to the reporting:

The game between the equally unknown Angry Birds and the Toastwood Facehuggers were apparently seen as a good Sunday pastime for the local masses eager for blood after the cancellation of the previous Sundays evening mass. The audience numbered ten thousand strong, and by its nature the Toastwood team was slightly preferred due to expectations that they should be more able to cause the violence and mayhem the audience wanted.

To increase the opportunity for said mayhem, the audience started by killing the Referee just as he whistled for the kickoff, which by Toastwood decision was made by the Birds. Once the ball came down, the chaos warriors and mutants started with the bashing, but did not forget to look back and make sure the ball came along.

When they looked forward again, the elves were arrayed in a rather traditional echelon defense, which took more than half of the first half to break into (and cost the mutants the ball once, but they managed to take it back.) Finally Matrias broke free and rushed for the endzone, only to be smashed into the ground before he had reached half the way, the ball temporarily ending up in the hands of Bird runner Alouette. A quick attempt to make a last second score for the Facehuggers ended up with the blitzing beastman grabbing the ball but not having enough oomph to reach the endzone before being smashed down again, Jena snatching the ball away from under the gaze of a guarding warrior, running halfway upfield and passing the ball to Daya who ran it in just as the newly assigned referee arrived to blow the ending whistle.

This act upset the chaotic fans, who immediately set out to kill the second referee as a goat of Toastwood kicked the ball dead center to the Birds. The Birds swiftly pushed up the left side, got stalled and nearly surfed, lost the ball, took it back and managed to run up the center, lost it again, managed to blitz it free and finally Sanny could pick up the momentarily unguarded ball and take it in for 2-0.

Seeing that the violence on the pitch was still not to their liking, the fans started pelting the teams with rocks, one of which beaned Zipporah and made her loose that drive. After some initial blocks, the Facehuggers lost the ball just as they were to pick it up, and a third of the birds started running into the Facehuggers half. (Another third was vaguely trying to stall two thirds of the Facehugger team, and the last third of the Birds were taking naps of different lengths.)

The Facehuggers did a show of stopping the Birds, and then (with so little time left) decided that what worked for the elves in the first half might work for them, and ran down to make a handoff which might have been followed by a run to pass and a run to score (and some time left to make up for failures at that.) Only the ballcarrier stumbled just as he was about to deliver the ball, and lost it instead in a place where a Bird blitzer could easily pick it up, and swiftly beat down the counterblitz before running over to handoff the ball to Alouette for the last score of the match.

Upset about this the crowds pelted the dark elves with rocks once more, but it seemed as if even their vaunted bloodlust had lost some, and no elves needed to be carried off pitch, and the game soon ended without further incident.

---
As a summary, the last three games of the Reserves Rumble - Lead Feathers - Reptile Dysfunction (Reserves Rumble, Reserves Rumble), Black Mambo - Dia de los muertos (Reserves Rumble, Reserves Rumble) and this one clearly shows the superiority of Dark Elves who won all three games. And since the Angry Birds won with the best TD difference and were the only team where nobody died, clearly they must be the most superior Dark Elf team.

Later on the very experienced Norse team SPAM! would win 4-1 in TD and 6-2 in Casualties against a fairly experienced Orc team, and the rookie Skaven team CRAP! would win 5-0 in goals and 5-1 in casualties against a rookie Norse team, putting the Angry Birds at third place in the total scoreboard, but when the report was written the Birds were the Best.

[coachman]

Thats a fantastic result. Loving the logo too. Is it your work?

[Morgred]

Nice win.. Unlucky not to be top of the table. 4-1,5-0 are massive scores. Even your 3-0 is big.

Awesome logo too

[Nikolai II]

The other Skaven team in the Rumble (one-shot) scored 4-2, but his was an experienced team. Having a worse TD difference, he still only got fourth place, but on average Skaven teams outscored the Dark Elf teams. But since I'm the only one to make a separate press release about it, I guess Dark Elves are best. (At PR at least.. er.. when compared to Skaven)

A fun fact:
The rookie Norse team outbashed by rookie Skavens rerolled his team, since his Berzerker had gotten -AG (no other permanent injuries)
His next game was during the Squigbowl (Also a one-shot game, for those who missed the playoffs) when he drew an experienced dwarf team (Worlds Edge Wreckers, known to those following the Bombers ) and lost 0-3 in TD and 0-11 in Cas:es. (Pitch cleared once, and two players left for last setup, thanks to his induced Icepelt Hammerblow regenerating nicely.
(He did get a -AG again, but this time it was his Snow Troll, so apparently he's not rerolling again )
((Ok, maybe I'm the only one who thinks it is a fun fact, but since that coach has rubbed me out twice with his TV 2000:ish Orc team I'm happy for him to see the AV 7 story from the receiving end )

-

Anyway, thank you for the attention and I'd love to take credit for the logo but I can't draw very well. It is the logo for the Louisville Cardinals, recolored to match the team colors and attitude.

[Nikolai II]

First game of the season was against a Lizardman team with 11 skinks, 1 krox, 3 RR and 2 FF.

They sure were hard to get down or get hold off, and I made a mistake in the first half in scoring too fast, letting him leave the first half with 2-1. I was lucky to get a draw, but I got one draw, five skillups and 60k winnings (so 80k in the kitty), so I'm not very upset. (Winning = 2p, draw = 1p, so I'm not horribly behind in standings either)

Anyway - match report:

With very sunny weather and a heavy audience advantage for the Crystal Sand Predators one could easily believe that the lizards had home pitch advantage. They also won the toss and chose to start attacking, but the Birds (fans) sang louder at the cheer-off.

The skinks of the Predators shrugged it all off and easily ran in the first score. Upset about this the Birds snapped to action and scored just as fast - which was probably a bad tactic since it allowed the Predators to also snap into action and score once more, while the Birds despite all the snapping in the world could not score once more before the whistle blew.

The second half the Birds snapped quickly again to equalize, letting the Predators start the last phase of the game with a final (and fifth consecutive) quick snap at the kickoff. It looked as if the Predators were all set for victory, but Utqay failed his very last dodge into the endzone.

Fans quickly passed the ball to Saslla who stood right next to the endzone, but being surrounded by elves he failed to catch the ball and it spilled to where the Birds could get it after quickly pashing Saslla out of the game and Isqha out of his life. The Birds couldn't do anything useful with the ball, though, and once doughty Kroxigor Apuc had taken down the receiver there was nothing more left in the game but counting the winnings and moving on to the next pitch, the Predators somewhat worse for wear, but that is life (and death) in Blood Bowl.

I skilled up three blitzers - one took AG, the other two dodge. Also the runner got dodge and the -AV lino.. well, she either takes dodge, kick or AG. I'm having troubles choosing.

+AG on a lino that is already on the "to sack" list sounds like a less than useful thing. Dodge might help keep her alive until I can afford to replace her for reals, and kick can be useful.. well, all the time until I fire her. (Playing slann next, then orcs, elves, chaos, khemri, necro, underworld and finally norse)

[Nikolai II]

On the other hand (since I have time to second-guess myself) - having a second AG 5 can be useful as a "ball-picker-upper" (passing it to the runner over six squares at 2+), and to have two possible ball-stealers when it is on the ground. I have a lino with a TD, so she's only one TD away from kick anyway)

And yea, throwing the ball more eats more rerolls, but I'm thinking I might get RR 3 before player 12 anyway - seeing as how I'll be getting so far ahead of everyone in TV too quickly otherwise.. (and RR 3 should come after the next game unless I'm very unlucky)

[Nikolai II]

I got a dirty player on the -AV lino, since then it matters less if she is sent off. It was also to be able to get that pesky AG5 blodge slann catcher off the pitch, should he ever get prone.

But that opponent first postponed, then got sick, then didn't get back in touch, so I finally got a concession out of the game, 70k winnings and two MVP:s that ended up where they didn't make any difference. (One on that dirty player, that is now only a TD away from sneaky git

TV difference to next opponent is 210k in his favor, so my first thought was to buy a third reroll and induce a wizard.

But now I am thinking that maybe I should buy a witch and induce a reroll instead.

That'd take me up to 12 players, and a good winnings roll (ok, really good) gets me a third reroll for the next game anyway.

Teams right now:
Me (2RR, apo, 2FF, 150k):
4 Blitzer: (2 dodge, one +AG, one rookie)
Runner: Dodge
6 Lino: (one DP, rest rookies)

He (orc, 3RR, apo, 4FF, 70k):
4 Blitzer: (Dauntless+Dodge, -MV+AV, Tackle, MB)
4 BoB: (ST+Block, Block, 2 rookies)
3 Linemen: Rookies
1 Troll: Rookie

[Nikolai II]

Decided to get the witch since I'd want one sooner or later, and sooner might be good enough. Only managed to score once with her before going MNG in the second half, but she did manage to surf two orcs along the way (and she was magical in how she'd do single-dice blocks to push the ballcarrier towards an assist and a two-dicer.

Oh, yea, the orc player did have a hard time getting caged. First kickoff he lost a BoB to a rock (KO, returned only for second drive of second half) and in total I think four of his players were surfed (three by the witch), two of which were KO:ed and didn't come back until the second half started. (One stun and one -MV cas who was apo:ed to BH)

Anyway, 3-0 to me in TD, 4-2 to him in Cas (2-0 in kills) and 2-1 in completions to me.

This match was clearly quite uninteresting, with a total of eleven thousand in the audience (slightly more for the orcs) but the fans that did arrive were the hard core, shown repeatedly during the game. First by throwing a rock that had Warak Pignose out for most of the game, then later on by repeatedly holding on to orcs that left the pitch in droves and finally by invading the pitch and knocking down several orcs and even a troll.

The dark elves with Circe in the lead did clearly dominate the mobility aspect of the game, but the orcs capitallized fully upon elven attempts to keep them tied down by brutally mangling them. Luckily for the elves, the orcs never got any good opportunity to head downfield, and two lucky thefts of the ball during the first half put the Birds nicely ahead with a 2-0 lead.

Second half Alouette lost the ball over the sidelines in a desperate attempt to get it to safety from a blitz, and the audience threw it deep into the orc half where the Thumbs could secure it. A slight misstep meant the ball could be sacked back for 3-0, and after that the game petered out with the Birds mostly milling about trying to not get any more casualties and the Thumbs nearly managing to score a consolation touchdown.

Yes, two players killed, but blitzer got better (yay apo) so down one lineman permanently and one witch for the next game.

Next up is "The Tiering Pair" that was recently renamed "Big Black Runners"
A pro elf team with no blitzers?

2 Throwers (1 w/ strong arm)
4 Catchers (Blodge, Dodge, +MV, Rookie)
6 Linemen (Rookies)
3 RR, 3 FF, Apo

Since it was these Pro Elves next and I couldn't afford a reroll anyway I got an assassin to get back to 11 players at once (12 after MNG clears).
If she survives now and against chaos next game she should be useful against Khemri skeletons, Necro ghouls, Underworld goblins and all of Norse too.

-AV lino rolled agility for the second time, again declined, this time in favor of sneaky git, so she should be able to kick in heads of everyone dumb enough to hit the ground. (Already got DP)
Another lino skilled and I went with dodge. Kick is magic and all, but I want it on a wrodger or blodger, or next season. This season is mostly to get skills and powers

[Netsmurf]

Did he not have any experience with frenzy players

[Nikolai II]

Minotaur of Chaos Dwarves, Trollslayers of two different Dwarves and Wolves of Necro he's faced. But none of those coaches have been very much of surfing coaches.

But despite thirteen games with the team he is still pretty much a rookie. He doesn't remember that doesn't include a push, or know dodge rolls properly.

(He also might not have been crowd-pushed much at all - he believed he could push me out when coming from an angle and I was free behind. And he repeatedly moved in an extra assist when he already had a two-dicer, but didn't bring one in when it would mean a three-dicer)