[Team Blog] The Goblin Team

[Raveen]

In the year 2510 Habgabblarr Ishkhan, exiled hobgoblin princeling found his way to the goblin tribe of Gish. The Gishites were exceptionally stupid and exceptionally violent. These traits would Habgabblarr well in his aim to retake his place with his people by founding a championship winning Blood Bowl team.

We now go to the diaries of Habgabblarr charting the course of The Goblin Team!

August 6th: After duping the imbeciles of this poxy village into forming a sports franchise we decended onto the plains to join or first tournament. Some casualities so far as we managed to drag some trolls along by feeding them the least talented goblin scum. The pressure to improve motivated by a desire to not get eaten seems to have worked. Hell, some of the runty idiots have even taken to inventing weapons in an attempt to survive longer. I don't see it working but the first time that chainsaw is used in anger I think the crowd will love it.

The first game is against some ill disciplined Skaven fresh from the sewers. Should be winnable if only the idiots remember how to pick the ball up.

August 7th: The idiots failed to remember how to pick the ball up. Gah, why did it have to be goblins. The first half went fine, I sent on the moron with the ball and chain and backed him up with the trolls. All the rest of them had to do was get the ball and run away until the Rats were back in the ground.

Well, the hitting part went fine until Stonepuke the troll needed explicit instructions on exactly which person is supposed to fall over when blocking a gutter runner (seriously, triple skulls? Lucky I have 4 rerolls but sheesh). The problem was in the back field. Having opted to receive it seems that 5 attempts to pick up the ball were not enough and the ratmen finally broke through my pitifully weak line to score.

Receiving again I decided to put the idiot with the chainsaw on the pitch. Much like training there were injuries a plenty from him but the trolls suffered from a bout of stupidity and failed to move an inch.

After half time we were kicking. Still, there was one last secret weapon to play, if you can call a pogo stick a weapon. We started well, moving off before the ball had landed. The trolls punched a hole and the goblin scum surrounded the skaven thrower. They couldn't get the ball but no worry, neither could we until the pogoing maniac managed to get hold of it and bounced towards the touchline. Having got the ball free we decided to stall and beat them up for a bit. Some serious ganging up later and their thrower goes off injured. Figuring that there's still a chance of winning we go for the endzone and score.

Kicking off again a much depleted goblin team lines up against a much depleted skaven team. They decide to hold the ball deep whilst my trolls hit away at their front line. Only one goblin can get through, blitzing their ball carrying gutter runner but only managing to push him back. Still, when the runner tries to dodge away a lucky boot tripped him and the ball comes free. With seconds to go all it needs is that last goblin to pick up the ball and dash for the endzone for a 2-1 win.

The idiot failed to remember how to pick the ball up.

Final Score 1-1.

[Netsmurf]

Very Nice

[coachman]

Nice report.