This just in from Clan Foebreakers recreation mine. Anvil of Doom have tested MagmaFury´s trick at cracking skulls and ore. It sure works wonders and Anvil of Doom looks forward to entering the next season, showing all just how skilled he are at pilling on
Today was a brutal match against those darn chaos goats - what should not be alloved to ecist in this our fine dwarf division.
After the brutal match against the evil no darn good chaos team - what should not be alloved in our lovely dwarf division - there was a feast in wich Coach Netsmurf had prepared a little extra special vial for Chillpill. The hero runner looked at the vial and wondered how the coach had managed to seemingly trap a storm in the little vial. Chillpill downed the storm in one big gulp - just like the ten ales that went before. Chillpill did lose the drinking contest against Coach Netsmurf, but that was forgotten soon as he felt a rush in his feets. Already able to dodge and sidestep most attacks Chillpill was supriced to find that running like the wind was no problem for him. In fact he was now the fastest dwarf in the clan - the mighty Clan Foebreakers finally had a Chillpill able to outrun, outdodge and outscore the opponents. This was a magnificent feast and Chillpill felt strong and healty, even the serious concussion he had suffered the afmath of was now nothing but a trifle matter, for he could run like the wind...
Clan Foebreakers beat the odds against a highly rated woodelf team. The clan was not overly worried though as they had the powers of a wizard with them into the game. A little goodie bag was also ready for any keen eyed ref, but there was no need for that as it seems there was no ref at the game. It all started with Coach Netsmurf desiding to receive the ball instead of kicking. and then followed a long grinding drive, were the hippies tried some crazy shit to get the ball lose, but that was in vain and after the mutant weed smoking catcher was downed by orerunner and KO´ed the thouchdown was secured. In second half the hippies managed to break through the Clans screen but no hippie catcher can outrun magic and zap he was down very close to the endzone and the ball was soon back on the hands of the rightous and only a failed pass in the end settled the score at 1-0 for the Clan. After the game Coach Netsmurf desided that guard duty was to be learnt by hero slayer Magmafury and also by Iron Clad Heel. This is going to bring the Clan into the top half of the table and with 4 games left all is still possible.
Clan Foebreakers are the true champions, in an epic game the Clan managed to win over fellow equals SMS. This was mainly done due to Orerunners amazing indwarf like abilities. He dodged right past the deathroller gigante like it was nothing but a pebble on the pitch and then ran free into the open and was never caught before scoring what turned out to be the winner in this epic final in the matches that matters. So with wins over both the other teams in the competion we have a winner - well a winner in the competition that matters.
Indeed, not diving tackle, not deathrollers, nothing would keep ore runner from the endzone. Did you get any goos skills?
In the aftermath - after both maiming a Crunch Cup official for remarks concerning Orerunner and drinking heavy to celebrate the win - it was time for Anvil of Doom to learn new tricks. Coach Netsmurf called the slayer into the not so secret lab and was about to instruct Anvil in the fine art of tackling, when the slayer grabbed a vial intended for the runners. Before coach Netsmurf could stop Anvil he shouted cheers and downed the drink. Fast as a somewhat fresh eagle did coach Netsmurf react and gave Anvil of Doom an antidote. It had the drawback that Anvil turned sober, but the huge advantage that he then understood the instructions on how to tackle. It shall be a pleasure to follow the maiming of otherwise able dodgers. PS. To all concerned - rest easy - Anvil of Doom managed to get drunk again
Phew, close run thing there! The tragic curse of sobriety effects more dwarves than is commonly realized. Let us take this moment to remind dwarf coaches everywhere to check their dwarves for sobriety on a regular basis, it can sneak up on you and its best caught early.
Clan Foebreakers have lost to flimsy woodies Coach Netsmurf on a drunken rampage have been heard to denounce the deity known as Nuffle. Bewilderment is great as the whereabouts of the coach are unknown and rumor has it that he was last seen wielding a machette and asking for directions to the nearest temple for Nuffle
OH no this is not a good end to the season. Clan Foebreakers have only managed to get a draw from a meating with skaven - them just be rats but somehow they were blessed. Is this retribution from Nuffle following Coach Netsmurf rant against said deity last week The match ended in a 1-1 draw but now it is enough. Coach Netsmurf went into his lab and soon funny stuff was ooooozing from out under the door. Hizzzzes was heard and the carefull cling and clang from turning someting around in a vial. Orerunner was summoned to the lab and soon after came out. He began a dance to the beer chant and such agility and dazzling display of dexterity was shown that it has only been whispered about in the dark mines as a legend. But here it was for all to see and the drinking stopped Such was the amazment of seeing the dwarf what moves like Mick Jagger
It has been a harsh end to the season for Clan Foebreakers. After Coach Netsmurfs ranting rampage against the well known deity Nuffle, things have not been going well. This is seen as further proof of the existence of said deity and thus Coach Netsmurf had a though decision to make at the biggest altar of all time - the blood bowl pitch. A sacrifice was needed and not just a chicken or a goat - no it had to be a prober sacrifice and so when the collar bone of Chillpill was broken, Coach Netsmurf knew that it was time to praise Nuffle and keep the apothecary in the dugout instead of helping Chillpill. Now with faith restored in Nuffle and a suitable sacrifice made it is the hope (firm belief) that Clan Foebreakers will return to Altdwarf in just one seasons time. Chillpill have joined the team as a running coach and instead of Chillpill a new blocker have joined the team - please welcome a dwarf with huge arms and bulging muscles - please welcome Skullcracker.