Discussion in 'Team Blogs' started by Remthar, Jul 1, 2013.
This is so good Rem.
We don't particularly expect this to work, or the other four groups either. But you know how it is in the Big Crunch... "They send one of ours into the river, we send several rag-tag bands of misfits to attempt to sabotage the floating palace of one of theirs!". Old rules.
I haven't read your blog before Remthar but I like it, keep up the good work!
Princess Androssia was sitting on the lawn at the edge of the Heroes training field. Her handmaidens were setting out tea and biscuits for her and Gwithiline, while they watched Illroth and the new rising star of the Heroes, Matoria, train hard.
“Look at them go… they’ll be dead or worse by the end of the season.” Said Gwithiline
“Oh I don’t know…” said Androssia “The High Coach hired a new Apothecary for this season.”
“Yes, a skink! The skinks are very cute, but as a doctor?!”
“Well he can’t be much worse than the quacks that feebly failed to patch us up…”
“Hmpf. I doubt it will matter to either of us though, rumour has it that you’re off the apo list too.”
“Have you been listening to Leonas? He’s just bitter about having been sacked for being the useless wastrel that he is.”
They watched Illroth enthusiastically knock over several rat-shaped sacks of wool, all of which had pies glued to them. Matoria drop-kicked one of the smaller ones into a nearby tree.
“Is it true you’re thinking of retiring?” asked Androssia.
“I’m so beat up after only a couple of seasons of this. I won’t survive much longer, and I’m worried about the fact that the High Coach owns a book tittled ‘Just let them go: How to say no and save your apothecary for the important people’.” Said Gwithiline
“Welcome to our world…” muttered Handmaiden Olaenia.
“Hmm?” said Androssia
“Nothing, my lady.” Said Olaenia
Illroth and Matoria finished kicking the head of one of the rat dummies backwards and forwards, and Illroth kicked it into a tree.
“I AM ILLROTH, DESTROYER OF RODENTS! FEAR ME ALTDWARF AND DESPAIR!”
“At least he’s keen.”
MD1 report up soon
Ilroth overperformed last season, time for a rude awakening.
Ulthuan Sporting Network
“…and now to our international segments. First up is Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm with the Greater Ulthuan Heroes in the Big Crunch! Eliaeth?”
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: Thank you Jounaethan. The Big Crunch is a human hosted league, based out of the city of Altdwarf.
Saethor: That is a stupid name.
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: Our expert analyst, Mithon Saethor. The league name, or the city name Saethor?
Saethor: Both. Why does a human city have the word ‘Dwarf’ in its name? That is stupid and false advertising. Either change it to the more sensible option of Althuman, or give the city to the dwarves. And don’t get me started on the ‘Big Crunch’. Obviously biased in favour of the ugly and skill-less “bash” approach to the game.
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: Indeed Saethor. Today we wil be looking at the highlights of the Heroes first two matches. Joining us in the studio is famous halfling journalist and television host, Mr. Cubbles Greenhill.
Cubbles: Damn you have a nicer studio then us… Food isn’t as good though.
Saethor: Eewwwww! Look at it, it’s proportions are all wrong! Its so small… and fat! It offends my eyes! I will be continuing the session while wearing a blindfold.
Cubbles: Hey, I didn’t have to show up you know! Maybe you should just stick to covering croquet tournaments or whatever it is you do, and leave Bloodbowl to the rest of us!
Saethor: I will have you know that I have been covering the Ulthuan ladies of the court Bloodbowl league for fifteen years! I know far more about the game then you, you small country pumpkin!
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: Ahem. I did in fact cover the Royal Eataine Croquet Tourney in a previous assignment, but I have researched bloodbowl quite throughly. Anyway, on to the Highlights. The Heroes first match was against the Nurgle team Disordered Personalities.
Cubbles: Nurgle eh, well… what are you two doing?
Saethor: Ugh, the very though of Nurgle team makes me need to wash my hands.
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: I also feel the need for hand sanitiser. But onto the the match. The Personalities had hired Morg n Thog for the match I understand?
Saethor: A pointless Ogre, beneath elven notice.
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: The match started off badly for the Heroes, with Blitzer Duke Illroth being hauled off the pitch with a damaged back from the first block, and then many of the Heroes best players getting themselves tied up next to the beast of Nurgle!
Cubbles: But the dumb elves were saved when the Beast suddenly started contemplating the meaning of the universe and let them go.
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: The Personalities were able to fend off Princess Androssia from Marking the Ball carrier, but the cage was forced to remain in too much contact and the Glorious elves surged in to knock the ball loose and run away with it!
Saethor: But instead of scoring immiedately, which wouold be the proper elvish thing to do, the stall! Foreign influence! Stalling is for dwarves!
Cubbles: The elves look like they think they’re safe, but a Pestigor manages so elf pla of its own to knock down Fereldes and the ball goes out of bounds!
Saethor: Please do not insult elves by calling what that…creature… did ‘elf play’. It may have dodged past some players, but it was nothing like true elvish athleticism.
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: The ball was thrown in just out of reach of the Heroes, the only players in range being trapped by the beast of Nurgle!
Cubbles: The Personalities are able to recover the ball and run for it, but the Pest trips right before he crosses the line! Classic endzone tripwire, well done Heroes!
Saethor: How dare you, cretin! True elves never cheat! The beast was just blinded by elven greatness and tripped over its own feet.
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: In the Second half the Heroes manage to force their way past the personalities, and pass to Salvaron, who edaves two blitzes before scoring by being pushed into the endzone.
Saethor: The the Heroes almost perform the true elvishness of a blitz from the kick, but are unable to keep hold of the ball. Princess Androssia is able to keep the Nurgle team at bay for a while, but when the beastly Ogre knocks her down the Nurgle are able to get the ball moving.
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: In the end it comes down to a blitz from Lineman Makillion to bring down the Pest at the last moment.
Cubbles: By falling on top of him! Match ended 1-0 win for the Elves.
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: On to the second match of the evening, which is the Heroes against the Pie-rats.
Cubbles: I like the sound of them!
Saethor: Look at the angle of the sun there! Thats going to be in elven eyes all match. They should have demanded a wizard adjust it! It is unfair!
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: The Rats received first, but failed to pick up the ball! The Heroes attempt to retrieve it, but fumble a difficult pass.
Cubbles: The Rats recovered the ball and made it to the midfeild, but a tackle from Androssia sees the rats cage exposed, the ball stolen and the Heroes score!
Saethor: Much better, none of this stalling nonsense.
Cubbles: fear of wizards will do that for you.
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: The Heroes were able to attack the ball carrier a couple of times on the next drive, but were unable to bring it down. The rats looked like they were pinned to the side for a moment near the end, but are able to escape for the score.
Cubbles: 1-1 at half time looks good for the elves, though their last minute show off pass from Purion fails pathetically.
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: The Heroes look like they’re going for a rapid touchdown at the start of the second half, but disaster strikes! Purion trips when moving to cover Thrower Exalia, and fractures his arm! Then the lightening bolt smashes into Exalia’s back, damaging it! A dramatic reversal of fortues for the Heroes there, and the rats are able to get to the ball first and score.
Saethor: Dishonourable rodent tactics! Filth! Treachery!
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: The Heroes are demoralised after that drive, and their hearts don’t seem to be in it any more. The end up low on numbers and pinned to the sideline, but Fereldes is just in range for a last minute score!
Cubbles: But the rats have a endzone tripwire of their own, and the game ends 2-1 to the Rats!
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: While the first match went well, thing are looking difficult for the Heroes going forwards. Two niggling injures to important players in the first two games could hurt them going forwards.
Saethor: I tell you if players are allowed to have claws in the game, why not just allow knives?! Or swords?! I tell you non-elf teams have no honour.
Cubbles: Do you really only have lettuce around for snacks?!
Princess Eliaeth Silverhelm: Thank you for watching dear viewers, now back to you Jounaethan!
Cubbles is the best reporter around, he makes watching High Elf games enjoyable
Cubbles is a true legend.
Cubbles popularity goes from strength to strength! His star is still rising, and his dreams of a Cubbles News Network will come to fruition yet!
So, I’ve been thinking about the Heroes, and some of their long running problems. I’ve got a theory, and was wondering if anyone has any thoughts on it.
Basically, it’s that Purion is to blame all of the teams problems.
…well maybe all is a bit to far. After Nik is still to blame for killing Zintiel. (If people think that Fereldes can score at will, imagine if he was faster and had catch… But noooo, she died. Godamn bull centaurs ) (Me making the occasional mistake could also have occasionally affected a hero match. Just a little bit…)
The main problem is the Heroes tendency to be cased off the pitch regularly, and the awkwardness for many of their players. Core skills always seem to be lacking on the team. I’ve got surprisingly few blodgers, and only a single sidesteper, which seems very low for a helf team at such a high TV. Being blessed by stats has been great for the team in many ways, but its also hurt skill progression. The stat players are screened on the pitch, while solid player with several regular skills bite the dust in their place. Right now Androssia (Blodge, SS, DT Catcher) Illroth (Blodge, tackle blitzer) Exalia (Strong arm, accurate dodge thrower) and Gwithiline (Blodge catcher) are all niggled, and its really wearing on me. The kicker having a -AV also doesn’t help the whole “staying on the pitch” thing.
So why is this Purions fault? Instead of being another guy on the line, shielding good players and being cheap, he became another positional. Currently I need to cover too many valuable players from harm, and I’m not succeeding. Looking over Purions career, I can only think of a couple of times he’s really saved the day. But I can think of a hell of a lot of times he’s fucked everything up, needing too many rerolls to do the simplest of things, been taking out too easily, or most commonly: do nothing but sit around and be expensive.
He has had one use of great value, and that’s as a threat. A leaping wrestler waiting in the wings is in many ways like having a wizard. The opponent must cage much more carefully, and be more cautious in their movement. (Though a leaper makes people bunch up and a wizard makes them spread out. The point is they fuck with what your opponent wanted to do in the first place and weigh on their mind.) I am feeling more and more that a wrodge catcher with leap would actually do that job better. Greater threat range, the player is performing their usual role anyway, and in general you shouldn’t actually be using leap that often anyway.
Here is the current state of the team.
Lots of potential. But the Heroes have always had lot of potential, and it keeps getting crippled or killed!
So I’m wondering right now whether to sack some of the Niggles. Gwithiline really needs to retire, niggled and with 30k bloat on her is not good. I was planning to wait until Matoria was blodged up, but maybe it will be wise to sack her before then. If I do sack her, should I her a replacement straight away or wait?
Illroth could be sacked, It would be only 6spp to get a new blitzer up to blodge. But I kind of need all the blodge I can get right now!
Can’t really sack Androssia or Exalia, they’re too valuable. Just got to keep hoping.
“…and that is why everything is your fault.”
Remtharion handed the very long list back to Rifeldin, and turned back to the bandaged up Purion. Purion glared back.
“You’re all just bitter because I’m the best player on this team!”
One thing you haven't mentioned is that you are in AltDwarf this season. The two AG boosted leapers represent your best chance of winning the thing. Whilst they certainly add alot to your team value what are you going to replace them with in the short term this season. If you are in tier 2 in the future you could look at major changes when it will be easier to rebuild.
For now some of your positionals will need to step up in the getting punched department. Lose Gwith armour 7 niggle is just asking for opposition killers to get some spp. You could replace her with a lineelf to beef up your screens. Three catchers should still get the job done. Then check you next two or three matches if you are not facing lots of dodge then the Blitzer could go as well. Only 6spp for an elf should be doable quickly. With less to protect and more standing in the way you should not have to do anything too drastic.
Oh and get skills on the guard lino as quick as you can.
Definitely fire Gwith now.
I'd probably fire the Duke too, but depends on who you face next.
Likewise, either hire a new lino or new catcher based on who you play next.
I always end up being unclear on something whenever I write big long posts, I wasn't considering sacking Purion. The point with him was more theorybowling about whether he was worth it in hindsight, here and now he's far too valuable to sack.
Gwithiline probably should have been sacked ages ago, with opinion in favor she will be retiring somewhere sunny right away.
Illroth is a harder pick, 2 human catchers next, a blodge MA8 Bullshit centaur second, and two werewolves and a couple of ghouls third. A single tackle could probably do the job, but the backup might be needed.
Just get a MVP on the wrestle lino. Sorted.
If you keep Ilroth you'll be carrying around 3 niggles, that's a lot, and honestly its not like you're facing mass dodge anytime soon - if you had jounisii coming up it'd be different - now's a good time to let him go.
Soooooo yeah. Kinda missed a seasons worth of fluff here.
My excuse is a combination of being tired of the high elf playstyle (or at least the style the Heroes were using), being tired of being mashed into the pitch, RL stuff keeping me more busy, and the big one of having nothing to play for for the season after around MD3 when I became fairly sure I would be claiming top place this season. Normally playing for top four or building would be fine, just that because I'm sitting out season 7 it doesn't matter were I sit, I'm back down to Tier 2 or even 3 when I return. And Building didn't mean much when I was planning to just retire the Heroes.
But in the end it feels good to have made 4th place just for honor even if it doesn't count for anything. Also the feel of the Heroes really turned around in the last part of the season.
Early in the season Purion was dragging us down. Him getting MA7 REALLY turned that around. AGI5 leap of MA7 is insanely better than on MA6, he can score in two turns with ease, can generally get where he needs to go and overall rolls a lot less dice. He's picking up SPP at 2-3x the rate as well! (This largely reinforces my opinion that he shouldn't have been given agi in the first place, if it only started to pay off with a second stat boost)
Fereldes has hit superstar at long last (only took 5 seasons for the First Heroes superstar...) and Sidestep makes his life a great deal easier and safer.
Generally the Hero squad is looking much stronger and all niggles except Androssia have been sacked. Several linos even have two skills now!
So I'm feeling very torn. I'm in three leagues (or will be again after I get back from a trip to the US and Europe.) With High Elves, halflings and Vampires. The heroes are looking quite good, but I really want to have a team that isn't on the reviving end of all the bash in at least one league, just for a change! (The Dark Flings may dish out the pain, but its hard to say they don't suffer as much or more in return...)
I've got a few months to figure out what I feel like doing, I'm feeling tired of the Heroes both from a fluff and Gameplay standpoint but they're in a good place and have such a history...
So sorry about the lack of fluff, whatever I choose in the end this won't be the last people hear of the Greater Ulthuan Heroes!
Just make it a three season break and go for something bashy in OFL next time around.
Hey guys, I'm back! Had a great trip and now am ready for some more Big Crunching!
But I'm tired of playing Agi and stunty at the moment (Vamps and Flings in other leagues, yes the Dark Flings are back too!) and feel like its time for some bash. This won't be the end of the characters, they'll turn up again either as part of other teams, commentators or in the inevitable sequel blog. (Greater Ulthuan Heroes 2: Hero Harder. Greater Ulthuan Heroes 2: Return of Remtharion. Greater Ulthuan Heroes 2: Now spelled correctly.)
So its time for some bash, but what to choose? I had been thinking about trying Orcs or Nurgle, but they're both quite well represented in BC. What's under-represented right now? I'm not really in the mood for norse/Amazons (aim is to not have a massive pile of my own players with crosses and bells over them at the end of every match...) but maybe Chaos or Khemri? Any other suggestions for switching to the bash side?
At the moment you would be the only player for either chaos or khemri. I had an idea of going chaos and hunting all the Dwarves/ChDorfs. However there is a certain thematic beauty if you were to do it.
Chaos again, we all remember how that went last time, time for some redemption (and no mino )
Chaos, but I am biased . I think they make a better team than Khemri at higher TV, and they don't really NEED any special rolls to be effective. Sure, an AGI 4 beast is nice, but every piece has at least 4 solid skills to pick from right off the bat. And you will need those skills, cause, well, you get nothing to start with (as you well know).
P.S. On the plus side, Chaos is the only team that can craft a Block/Claw/Tackle/Mighty Blow/Piling On/Juggernaut player without rolling any doubles at all - he just has to live long enough. Replace Tackle or PO with Frenzy (you blitz at STR 4) for extra lolz.
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