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Citizen Nev Gives Each Race A Motto

Discussion in 'General Blood Bowl News and Discussion' started by Citizen Nev, Apr 12, 2013.

  1. Citizen Nev

    Citizen Nev Member

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    Introducing...​

    Citizen Nev Gives Each Race A Motto




    Rascism is bad. That's a given. So why is race so important in Blood Bowl. Was the designer of the game a bad man? Probably as that explains Claw. Anyway, I have given each race a short motto that you can put in the motto box when you make your team. This is important because if you don't have a motto you...well...ok it's not important at all.

    Amazons - Fuck off, Dwarves

    Bretonnians - We don't exist

    Chaos - CLAWPOMB is our only strategy

    Chaos Dwarves - 30% more hated than regular Dwarves

    Chaos Pact - Everyone on FUMBBL says we're great

    Dark Elves - You only play us to look at Witch tits

    Dwarf - Guard, Mighty Blow...errr....Kick?

    Elf - Good God we're annoying

    Goblin - One day, someone will play us not as a joke

    Halfling - Blood Bowl for masochists

    High Elf - A bunch of complete pricks

    Human - Come and see us moan about our Catchers

    Khemri - Playing for the 0-0

    Khorne - As reliable as our creator's matchmaking platform

    Lizardmen - All your STR are belong to us

    Necromantic - It's all fun and games until a Werewolf dies

    Norse - We're a bash team that can't take a bashing.

    Nurgle - Regen never works and we also have Decay. Fun!

    Ogre - Oh it all looks so good on paper

    Orc - For when you simply can't win with any other team

    Skaven - We have 7 players that are just filler

    Slann - Not even we know what the fuck we're supposed to be doing

    Undead - Like Necromantic but with added boring

    Underworld - A combination of 2 bad teams

    Vampire - Win 4-0, Lose 4-0

    Wood Elf - For people who hate people
     
  2. 20phoenix

    20phoenix Well-Known Member

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    This. This is true​
     
  3. Rama Set

    Rama Set Member

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    I think High Elves should be: Like humans, but elves.
     
  4. HC Vanselow

    HC Vanselow Member

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    LMAO...Poor Khemrian squad !!! It's truthful though as my Sacred Mekhta Kings feature the powerful prowess on "O" of Wen-Amun Harakhte (Thro-Ra), yet most of the time it is our defensive unit attempting to keep the score 0-0, 1-1 as a draw is to be celebrated just as much as a win when you're a Khemrian HC.
     
  5. Lebe666

    Lebe666 Well-Known Member

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    Perfect !! Especially Necro & Undead ! :p
     
  6. Rama Set

    Rama Set Member

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    Mange moin!! Undead are OG!
     
  7. HC Vanselow

    HC Vanselow Member

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    What are some people's personal mottos for their squads (Team name, Race and Motto) ???
     
  8. Nikolai II

    Nikolai II Super Moderator Moderator

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    My suggested motto for Undead was "At least we're not Khemri" ;)
     
  9. Lebe666

    Lebe666 Well-Known Member

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    Or "Waddaya mean we have 4 without regen ?!"
     
  10. Ken

    Ken Kenny the Mechanic

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    My Liz, the Old Dirty Dodge Ballers; "In it to win it, or at least have some fun" and a gob team named Rococo BullS Hit "Going for Baroque", I think it's easier to generate flavour for teams you don't can't imagine winning with.
     
  11. HC Vanselow

    HC Vanselow Member

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    My Green Knoll Gourmets (Halflings) motto is: "We'll slug it out for a smorgasbord" as the remaining players get spoiled rotten to their hearts desire with a banquet.
     
  12. Narly Bird

    Narly Bird Well-Known Member

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    I like the Undead one. So true!
     
  13. Jbecks

    Jbecks Member

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    My pro elf team is Arte et Marte, Latin for by skill and fighting, although not much fighting as last game I made a total of 16 blocks the whole game :) but won 3-0 :)
     
  14. Basilisk9466

    Basilisk9466 Member

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    When you constantly feel like you need to apologise for playing a team, you know this is true.
     
  15. Mr Drake

    Mr Drake Member

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    My personal favorite: a Halfling team named "There Will Be Cake!" with the motto "What do you mean the cake is a lie?"
     
  16. HC Vanselow

    HC Vanselow Member

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    It's not like you'll have to provide the cake because normally there isn't enough of the chubby bastards left to make it worth turning the oven on !!! My Green Knoll Gourmets who will "slug it out for a smorgasbord" could've just given them vouchers for McMurty's as only Orville Kikkoman and Jacques Heinz remained on the pitch after the rest of the team got massacred by some dirty stinking Orcs...
     
  17. Kjelstad

    Kjelstad Active Member

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    That is some deep dorf insight there.
     
  18. HC Vanselow

    HC Vanselow Member

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    Kjelstad, did you just refer to the Green Knoll Gourmets as Dwarfs ??? They're Halflings :p
     
  19. Dalryk

    Dalryk Member

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    The Snotballz would like a word with you. We'll see who's laughing at the end of it. :mad::mad::mad::mad: :D
     
  20. Kaz

    Kaz Active Member

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    I KNEW I had a thing for witch tits but I wasn't able to see that in myself. Thank you Nev, I've learned a tittle something about myself with this read. I've always thought that Dark Elves were one of the breast races but I see now that maybe I have a problem. Feels good to get that off my chest