S1, MD8: Hoodcrow Tzars (Ama_Nesciri, Norse) No cunning plan for this: I'm faster, tougher and more agile than the norse with more bash skills, I'll be looking to smash the AV7 weaklings back into last season. Stomp, kill and destroy, while scoring touchdowns as quickly as possible assuming there aren't a load of KO's waiting to come back. Time to take the loin cloths to the cleaners Spoiler Contused won the toss and chose to receive, hoping to cause a few scrimmage casualties to get things going. Only they didn't as the Norse decided to blitz the cocky humans instead, stunning Broken Ribs the blitzer on the right and getting their MB berserker next to the ball as the rest of the drunken loons marked up everyone they could reach. Caught off guard Contused's response just about qualified as competent, gathering the ball into a cage on the scrimmage but failing to break armour on any of their knockdowns. The Tzars continued to pile on the pressure, surrounding the cage and badly hurting Tennis Elbow the thrower, though an attempted foul on Broken Ribs didn't break armour but did get the lineman sent off. Feeling the clammy hand of fear on their backs Contused completely borked up their "cage" after failing to knock anyone over, leaving most the Norse team in contact with it - while the Tzars didn't manage to down Detached Retina the thrower they did knock over half of Contused and left the poor carrier sandwiched next to two noresemen, and ulf and the Yhetee. Basically, things weren't looking good for the humans. Detached Retina managed to block his way free, killing a lineman in the process (apo'd to badly hurt) but the Norse were still all over the "cage" and sure enough pulled it to pieces the following turn, opening a one dice hit on Detached Retina from the MB berserker. The first dice came up but critically the second was a - the humans could escape. Darting upfield to the left three of the blitzers and Brain Trauma the ogre formed a screen for Detached Retina to hide behind, hotly perused by the norse who broke through but couldn't get in front. With the KO's racking up Contused made their play, handing off the ball to Torn Ligament the blitzer who ran it in for the score on turn 5. Between sendings off, injuries and KO's it was 10 v 9 in the Tzars favour for the second drive, but thanks to the ball landing right in their endzone the norse split their team with most of them pushing forwards while only two went back. Things started picking up for Contused with one of the Ulfs injured out of the game on a block as two blitzers lapped round the Norse screen to pressure the ball: with only a couple of players free the Tzars put together a very loose screen in the middle of their own half, opening up a two dice hit on the carrier that downed him and spilled the ball next to Contused's blitzers. The norse managed to recover but disaster struck when their Yhetee double against a lineman and injured himself out of the game, turning them over before they could shore up their defence. There was a chance for Contused, albeit a slim one: Brain Trauma ran forwards to assist Torn Ligament in a one dice hit on the carrier that spilled the ball into a norse tacklezone. As Shattered Pelvis clambered to his feet and dodged into the endzone Detached Retina sprinted forwards, grabbed the ball from under the norseman's nose and made the short pass to Shattered Pelvis who caught it without batting an eyelid, all with no team re-rolls left - 2-0 to Contused. With the Tzars doing nothing worse than exchanging harsh yet incomprehensible words on the final turn of the first half the tables were turned at the start of the second with it now being 10 v 8 for the humans. After a riot the ball landed deep in the norse half again, only this time they flubbed the pickup early in their turn giving Contused a chance to strike. Compressed Fracture the blitzer ran forwards and KO'd a lineman on his way towards the ball, with Torn Ligament and Shattered Pelvis hot on his heels. Hoping that the humans had overcommitted to the attack the Tzars made a successful passing play to their Ag4 runner who sprinted into the humans half, but with no support it was easy enough for the blitzers to jog back and knock him out. A scramble for the ball followed but the norse could only make it over in dribs and drabs, letting the humans deal with them one by one. By the time the dust had settled Contused were comfortably in control with only 3 norsemen left on the field, allowing an easy run in on turn 13. With some brave souls waking up to face the grinder again the Tzars received on turn 14 with 6 drunken loons facing 9 sober loons. The depleted norse recovered the ball and tried to form a cage, but when the remaining ulf proved as adept at dodging as you might imagine they turned over before they could secure the carrier and he was swiftly surrounded by Contused's blitzers. An ambitious pass from three tacklezones was fumbled letting Contused steal the ball again while simultaneously flattening every Tzar left on the field: with only one turn left the norse threw in the towel and didn't even stand up, letting the humans run in their fourth as the full time whistle blew - 4-0 to Dazed and Contused. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Dazed and Contused rolled 6.9 on the D6 (52 rolls) and 15.6 on the 2D6 (42 rolls) with 49% successful blocks (87 dice) at an average of 1.93 dice per block with 1 turnover Hoodcrow Tzars rolled -10.7 on the D6 (45 rolls) and -9.7 on the 2D6 (42 rolls) with 60% successful blocks (102 dice) at an average of 1.92 dice per block with 4 turnovers =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= The first drive was incredibly close - a blitz and some aggressive play form the norse, coupled with poor block dice and stupid play from me, lead to a very ropey touchdown that very nearly didn't come off. After that it was a kerb stomp, with the rapidly dwindling norse having no answer for the superior array of players and dice at my disposal. 31SPP from the match saw three players level up, and with the MVP landing on the ogre that's a slightly silly 9 MVPs without a single one hitting a lineman. Good times all round then, sitting unassailably at the top of the table with some squishy looking skaven for dessert. Who fancies some rat pâté?